I want to pray like them — out loud

Dear Mason & Teo,
I am part of a Bible study group where the leader picks someone to pray. I don’t know how to pray aloud and I am afraid the leader may pick me to pray. I am not sure if God even answers my prayers. How do you know what God sounds like? How do these people know what to say in prayer? I wish I could pray like them. Any advice? (Silent Prayer Warrior)

Dear Silent Prayer Warrior,

It is great to hear that you are involved in a small group community that helps you to grow closer to Jesus Christ and one another.

Have you ever walked into a conversation between two people and just listened to what they were saying? How about a conversation between your parents when they’re talking about you? Well, praying aloud is sort of like that. It is that person’s conversational relationship with God and your presence in the conversation includes you in it.

Silence is the universal prayer. The same letters in the word “silent” rearranged is the word “listen.” Listening to God is prayer.

We Catholics pray in many different ways: contemplation, the rosary, novenas, meditating on the Scriptures, reciting favorite prayers and, of course, the Mass, which is the greatest and highest form of prayer. The Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC 2562), tells us that prayer involves the whole person. It is the “whole man who prays.”

Scripture speaks of the soul or the heart of a person as the source of prayer. It is “the heart that prays. If our heart is far from God, the words of prayer are in vain.”

“The heart is the dwelling-place where I am, where I live … The heart is our hidden center, beyond the grasp of our reason and of others; only the Spirit of God can fathom the human heart and know it fully. The heart is the place of decision, deeper than our psychic drives. It is the place of truth, where we choose life or death. It is the place of encounter because as the image of God we live in relation: it is the place of covenant” (CCC 2563).

Thus, “Christian prayer is … the action of God and of man, springing forth from both the Holy Spirit and ourselves, directed to the Father, in union with the human will of the Son of God made man” (CCC 2564).

Prayer is a gift from God and to pray one must freely consent to it. If you feel uncomfortable praying aloud, tell the leader of your group. Mother Angelica of the Eternal Word Network once said, “The best way to pray is the way you pray best.”

It sounds like you want to grow into praying aloud. Writing down your prayer helps. Practice often and eventually you’ll be able to pray without using notes.

We can become discouraged in prayer because God doesn’t seem to hear us. God hears and answers every prayer. We just cannot see, or always understand, how God is answering our prayer. Sometimes his response is “no.” God knows what is best for us. Although we may want something that seems good to us now, God may deny our request because of what it may mean to us later.

Since prayer comes from the depths of a humble and contrite heart, it’ll often sound like your own voice or the voice of conscience. To determine whether that voice is truly from God, we must measure its fruit. “The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control” (Galatians 5:22-23).

Prayer can be a battle against ourselves when we feel too tired, busy or bored to pray. It can also be a battle against the devil who does not want us to pray. The evil one will do anything to keep us away from God. If a person is not trying to live the Gospel, he or she will not be able to pray. Therefore, to pray well then is to live well, to live the faith, to practice virtue and to fight temptation. “We pray as we live, because we live as we pray” (CCC 2725).

Say a prayer today!