COLLEEN SATHRE

Mentoring

Has anyone ever told you that you were or are their mentor? Have you wondered what you did to merit this distinction or what mentoring is all about?

Mentoring is a popular topic when discussing good leaders. Because of the important role leadership development has in our diocesan Road Map, I will share some personal observations on mentoring.

The first major recommendation of “Witness to Jesus: Diocesan Road Map for Pastoral, Program, and Facility Needs 2008-2013” is “leadership development of clergy, lay staff, and volunteers.” As parishioners at vicariate meetings spoke of actions and resources needed to make progress on ALL of the major recommendations of the Road Map — youth and young adult programs, faith formation, homelessness, facilities, and land issues — they made many references to the importance of leadership training and education.

So what would it mean to be a mentor for future leaders of our parishes as they deal with day-to-day practical problems? The dictionary describes a mentor as “a wise and trusted counselor or teacher … an influential senior sponsor or supporter” (Webster). The first word that comes to me when I think about mentoring is sharing.

Sometimes it is easier to notice mentoring qualities that are missing in leaders than it is to describe a good mentor. There are people who guard their knowledge. It seems that they fear sharing their knowledge will somehow diminish their leadership role. When dealing with an issue or problem, the message such folks convey is: I know what would help, but I’m not going to share that information. This is an attitude that is more concerned about power and control than about helping others deal with difficulties. Fortunately, this behavior is usually the exception.

I’ve observed that the best workplace mentors do not think about mentoring as such. They share and they do it instinctively. In the course of casual conversations or even formal sessions, they share with others the situations they are dealing with and what seems to be working and not working. This sharing gives those who are less experienced insight into the complexities and consequences of decision making they had not considered.

As many have heard me share in the past, one of the most difficult leadership lessons to internalize for those new to an environment is that knowing what to do is the easy part — knowing how to get it done is the really difficult part. For example, it is easy for the inexperienced leader to observe a personnel situation and say: just move person a out of job x and replace with person b. Making needed personnel changes while protecting the value and worth of those on both sides of a decision — that is an art form. This is where a mentor can help.

It is as important within our church as it is in society to have leaders who are willing to share their successful strategies and even their failures with those coming along behind them.

Sometimes mentoring may be no more than sharing one’s confidence in another. The respected teacher or superior who told you as you went off to a brand new job/environment to remember that you had what it takes to make your way in that new world. The person who gave you tips on what you were likely to encounter as you went into a difficult meeting, gave you ideas about options, helped you to think about the pros and cons of a decision.

Sometimes a good mentor tells you what you may not want to hear. For example, that if you are serious about wanting to pursue a certain leadership position, then you are going to have to do certain things — these might involve more education, training, or even some personality adjustments. A good mentor keeps others in the loop. One becomes a better leader because one has the opportunity to “be in the room” and observe good leaders in action.

Mentoring isn’t just for those who have credentials or fancy titles; it is something all can do because we can all share. Sharing that helps those who follow us to be good leaders — isn’t that what Jesus did and isn’t it what we can do to witness to Jesus?