By Eunice Paglinawan | Special to the Herald

The Diocese of Honolulu will begin its seventh formation class for permanent deacons in the fall of 2009. Information sessions will be offered on several islands this fall for active Catholic men, 30 and older, who feel called to this particular vocation. The Hawaii Catholic Herald will be publishing articles by deacons this summer to re-introduce readers to this special ministry. This issue’s author, Eunice Paglinawan is the wife of deacon Ron Paglinawan.

On July 26, 2001, my husband, Ron Paglinawan was ordained as a deacon for the Diocese of Honolulu. The day was truly one of rejoicing and celebration for the two of us and all our family and friends. I felt so proud of Ron for successfully making it through the diaconate formation process and was certain that God had called him to the diaconate vocation.

I also felt so thankful and blessed for having the privilege of journeying with him in the diaconate formation throughout the four-plus years. However, I must admit that when we started the diaconate program, four years seemed so distant in the future. It also seemed like we were being shown a really steep mountain from afar and were expected to climb that mountain together.

But, on the day of Ron’s ordination, it felt so worth it and time seemed to have flown by so quickly.

Attending the diaconate program with Ron was a very growth-filled experience for me. I learned even more about our Catholic faith, church history, prayer and Scripture than I ever did throughout my Catholic School education, elementary through college.

Interestingly, within a few months of starting the program, I started to look forward to each of the monthly sessions. Spending the weekend at St. Stephen’s was like being on an educational retreat with Ron each month. I especially enjoyed the camaraderie and bond that we developed with the other deacon candidates and wives.

Certainly, there were times of indecision and challenge, but what helped to get us through the diaconate program was the support that we received from our coordinators, team staff and other deacon candidates and wives. Ron and I also learned to be supportive, positive and encouraging to each other in our own couple relationship. We learned how to elevate each other’s spirit and commitment, especially when one of us may have been feeling unsure or reluctant.

Today, as a deacon’s wife, I am Ron’s greatest cheerleader in his diaconate ministry. As a result of what we learned during the diaconate formation, I’ve realized that Ron’s success as a deacon is greatly enhanced by the support and encouragement that I give him.

Whether the gesture appears as insignificant as listening to Ron or massaging his neck when he gets uptight about something in his ministry to helping him in a significant way with a certain project, I have accepted the responsibility and call, as his wife, to be there to support Ron in his diaconate ministry.

I have also learned that we both have to continually work hard to ensure that our marriage relationship is a vibrant sign of our sacrament of matrimony and we are good role models. For us, this means taking the time to prioritize our schedules and making the commitment to spend special quality time with each other once a week.

The people in Our Lady of Perpetual Help Parish welcomed us with open arms when we were assigned there, and I have felt so loved and accepted by them. I have personally grown as a result of my role as a deacon’s wife and by the different activities that we have participated in. Likewise, I have been challenged to overcome some of my shyness and to always interact with friendliness and sensitivity with whomever I meet.

Since our gift as a couple has been in the marriage ministry for the past 30 years, Ron and I work together in the marriage preparation program in our parish at Our Lady of Perpetual Help in Ewa Beach, assist him with weddings and at times with funeral prayer services. We also meet with couples who may be struggling in their marriage or couple relationship. We have given presentations together for our parish and young adult retreats. We have also been involved as a couple on the diocesan level in various ministries and projects and recently presented a Marriage Enrichment day for Army couples who are being affected by the Iraq War.

Since Ron’s ordination, one of the things that I really appreciate and look forward to is being with other deacons and their wives in various diaconate gatherings. Somehow, I feel so enriched and joyful when we are able to share experiences, cheer each other on, listen to other’s experiences and simply enjoy each other’s company. I have realized that being a deacon and a deacon’s wife can be challenging at times but it can also be so refreshing and worthwhile when we love and support each other.

Our family has been truly blessed to have Ron as a deacon. At times our children and families seem to think of Ron as their personal family deacon. So, I have encouraged his involvement in such events as witnessing our youngest son’s wedding, baptizing several grandchildren, doing the funeral and burial services for relatives, blessing their homes and cars, etc.

Our journey together in the diaconate has been life-giving and we feel honored to serve the people of God. Naturally, as his wife, I think that Ron is a great deacon and I believe that he is doing an excellent job in his diaconate ministry.